Ashley A's Secret
by Flaire Delacour with Faith
Summary: FINAshley A has a deep dark secret that no one not even her fellow Ashleys now. Soon everyone in the Playground will know thanks to her brother Tyler.
1. Default Chapter

"Like get out of here you brats!" exclaimed Ashley A to her second grader brother Tyler and kindergarten sister Brittany.  
  
The two ran out with mischievous looks on their faces.  
  
Ashley groaned and took her diary out her school backpack.  
  
She began to write not being able to forget what had happened that past week.  
  
"So then like Ashley Q told me that T.J and Spinugly kissed last recess as an 'experiment'." said Ashley T as the four Ashleys walked into the school building.  
  
"Like why would Detweiler kiss the ugliest Ashley in history?" asked Ashley B.  
  
"Like no idea but they did come late to last period after everyone else had gone." said Ashley Q.  
  
Ashley A said nothing as the row of Ashleys stopped at their lockers and opened them in unison.  
  
She had a massive crush on TJ Detweiler but no one knew not even her fellow Ashleys.  
  
Ashley A just listened as the other Ashleys chatted amongst themselves about Hustler kids.  
  
She pulled her brush out her bag and brushed her hair while looking in the mirror. Her Science project was at the bottom of her locker.  
  
Ashley A put her brush back in her bag and looked into the mirror as she was closing the door to see TJ and his group coming up the corridor.  
  
Ashley felt her heart beat increase as she slammed the door and pushed into the Ashley circle.  
  
"Hey ladies. Nice day isn't it?" asked TJ his hands in his pockets.  
  
Ashley B laughed.  
  
"Oh look if it isn't Spinugly's Prince Charming." grinned Ashley T putting her other arm through the other bag strap.  
  
TJ shrugged but Ashley A saw some red enter his cheeks.  
  
"And oh look if it isn't her royal ugliness right now." smirked Ashley Q.  
  
Ashley A saw Spinelli coming down the corridor.  
  
"Hey powder puff why don't you keep your mouth to you self before i move it to the other side of you mouth." threatened Spinelli clenching her fist at Ashley Q. The other three Ashleys looked expectantly at their leader.  
  
"Like come on girls. Let's get to class before we catch fleas." sneered Ashley A out of deep felt jealousy.  
  
The other three Ashleys giggled as they followed Ashley A down the corridor to their classroom.  
  
"What was that about Teej?" asked Vince as they followed the others to classroom.  
  
"I don't know. But didn't you notice that Ashley A was a bit low on the up keep today?" asked TJ.  
  
"Strange. May be she's been dreaming about King Bob to much." said Vince.  
  
TJ said nothing as he entered the room and walked up the row to his desk.  
  
He saw Ashley A look at him out of the corner of her eye. But when she caught his eye her face flushed and she looked down at her pad.  
  
TJ sat down at his desk and looked at Ashley.  
  
He'd never really thought about her as shy. But her being slow on the insults today did make him wonder. 


	2. The plan is heard

Miss Growki came in and interrupted his train of thought.  
  
After taking the register miss Growki began one of the days lessons.  
  
"Right then let's rethink what we were doing yesterday. What was the meaning behind Martin Luther King Jr's speech I have a dream'?" asked Miss Growki.  
  
Not surprisingly Gretchen put up her hand.  
  
"I believe miss Growki that the speech was to try and stop the segregation going on during the time," said Gretchen.  
  
"Correct Gretchen. Now I have left the video of the speech down in the staff room. TJ would you please fetch it for me?" asked Miss Growki filling in a hall pass.  
  
"Of course miss Growki," grinned TJ getting up from his seat and walking to the front.  
  
"Here's your hall pass and a key to the staff room," said Miss Growki passing the two objects to TJ.  
  
TJ took the objects and walked out the classroom. He walked down the corridor and took a detour from the direction of staff room.  
  
He instead walked in the direction of the boy's toilets.  
  
He walked in and heard the familiar voices of all the Ashley's brothers Tylers.  
  
He hid in one of the cubicles and listened in on their conversation.  
  
"So then Ashley A just left it on the breakfast bar. I've decided to embarrass her there's this real gooey part about Deitweiler. So now I'll need to use Principal Prinkle's P.A system at Recess. Tyler B and Tyler T distract Prickle and Finster. Tyler Q fuse this microphone to the PA and bring the microphone to me on old Rusty a quarter of a way through recess." came Tyler A's voice.  
  
"NOTORIOUS!" chorused the other three Tylers as they made their way out the toilets.  
  
TJ sighed as he finished his business and walked to a sink.  
  
He couldn't believe what he'd just heard. Tyler A was going to embarrass his sister by reading from something personal.  
  
TJ dried his hands and walked out the toilets towards the staffroom.  
  
Maybe he'd be able to stop them.  
  
TJ walked to the staffroom and opened the door with the key. He spotted the videotape being used as a coaster for a paper cup and threw the cup away. He picked up the tape and closed the door behind him.  
  
But how could he stop the Tylers? They were as sneaky as their sisters at times.  
  
TJ walked back to his classroom and sighed.  
  
What ever they were doing he'd just have to let them do it. No matter how much he secretly liked Ashley A there was no way to stop the Tylers.  
  
TJ walked into the classroom and put the tape on Miss Growki's desk with the staffroom key and walked back to his desk.  
  
TJ sat down and copied down the things from the board. He heard the bell for Recess ring and felt a lump form in his throat.  
  
He gulped loudly and got to his feet. 


	3. OH THE SHAME!

"So TJ what do you think we should do about the powder puffs?" asked Spinelli punching a fist. TJ just followed the gang out to the playground and spotted Tyler T near the kindergarten gate making a deal with Brittany A. TJ saw Tyler Q slip into principal Prickle's office through the open window and sighed. "What's wrong TJ?" asked Vince following his gaze. "Nothing. Just prepare for the worst," said TJ as he and the others climbed onto the jungle gym.  
  
Halfway through recess Tyler A stood on top of old rusty with the pink notebook in his pocket. He saw Tyler B faking an injury to keep Finster occupied and Tyler T helping principal Prickle round up the kindergarteners with the teachers help. Tyler Q had fused the spare microphone to the PA and was now creeping across the playground to reach Tyler A. Tyler A flicked through the page of the pink notebook until he found the page he was looking for. He then waited until Tyler Q arrived holding the microphone in his hand. "Thanks." grinned Tyler A. He looked up at the clock on the school building before turning it on. "Attention attention members of the playground. I Tyler Ambrouster hold here in my hand a piece of information I felt I should share." said Tyler A looking out over the playground. Everyone was looking at him, even his sister and her snooty club. "This is from a diary, my sister Ashley's to be precise and this entry is dated January ninth, nineteen ninety six. 'Like, today has been a day of total embarrassment. I noticed how much I like TJ Deitweiler.' The playgrounds occupants gasped and all looked to Ashley who hid inside the Ashley clubhouse. "'He is the most cutest guy I have like ever seen but none of the other Ashleys must know. '''cos like if they did my reputation would be ruined and I might even be kicked out forever. He has like the most unique fashion sense that I have ever seen. Shame he hangs out with Spinelli else he'd make a good crush.' I think that says it all." smiled Tyler A. The playground began to whisper in astonishment. TJ felt his face flush as people began to look at him. "Can you believe it Teej? a powder puff actually has a crush on you." smirked Spinelli. "God, she seemed smitten according to that entry." said Vince. "I know, come on TJ let's go to the toilets." said Mikey. TJ smiled appreciatively at his friend. That meant he was helping him suffer less embarrassment in the playground and he couldn't haven't wanted anything more. 


	4. The secret

TJ, Vince, Mikey and Gus all walked into the school building and into the boys' bathroom.  
  
"Wow. That's just amazing TJ." said Gus sitting on the floor.  
  
"Yeah an Ashley having a thing for you is a big thing. Especially when we're not even in high school yet," said Mikey.  
  
"What should I do?" asked TJ leaning against the wall.  
  
"What do you mean? You're not the one who got humiliated in front of the entire playground." frowned Vince.  
  
"I feel responsible. I should have stopped it," said TJ.  
  
"What do you mean Teej?" asked Gus.  
  
"I heard the Tylers planning this when I came here before going to the staff room." said TJ.  
  
"Well why didn't you?" asked Vince.  
  
"'Cos I thought that if I did then everyone would know that I..." said TJ before he realised it would sound dumb.  
  
"That you what Teej?" asked Mikey though TJ could tell he already knew.  
  
"That I really secretly like Ashley A.," said TJ quickly looking at the ceiling to avoid looking at is friends.  
  
But all he heard was silence.  
  
"Ohmigod TJ." said Vince.  
  
"It's no big deal," said TJ.  
  
"No big deal? TJ you have your first crush. And on an Ashley no less." said Gus.  
  
"You guys can't tell, OK 'Cos if anyone knows I'll be as humiliated as Ashley A was." said TJ.  
  
"We promise TJ," said Mikey.  
  
The other two nodded.  
  
The four then walked back out onto the playground and saw Hustler kid giving out white T-shirts with 'Ashley A 4 TJ Deitweiler' printed on hem.  
  
TJ gulped.  
  
Gretchen came over with Ashley A whose cheeks were bright red. Spinelli was following reluctantly behind the two, her fists clenched.  
  
TJ felt his heart rate increase.  
  
"Hope you don't mind us bring Ash here but the other Ashleys have rejected her after finding out she kept a crush from them." said Gretchen, a comforting arm around Ashley A's Shoulders.  
  
Vince, Gus and Mikey all shook their heads at Spinelli and Gretchen.  
  
The two girls looked puzzled and TJ gestured for the guys not to tell them.  
  
"I like totally understand if you don't want me to hang around with you," said Ashley A avoiding T.J's gaze.  
  
"No its just that Er we were just going to talk about some stuff." said Vince.  
  
"Erm Gretchen, Spinelli can you help the three of us get some lunch money?" asked Mikey.  
  
" Sure." said Gretchen as she and Spinelli followed Gus, Mikey and Vince into the School.  
  
"You want to sit down?" asked TJ as the two of them walked to a picnic table.  
  
"Thanks. I'm like so embarrassed about what my stupid brother did." blushed Ashley A sitting down.  
  
"Hey it's OK," said TJ.  
  
"I like hope I didn't embarrass you too much." said Ashley.  
  
"Not at all." said TJ sitting on the other side.  
  
"So, like, what's with your friends why'd they, like, leave us?" asked Ashley.  
  
"Um they just had to go and think of a way to get back at your brother," said TJ trying to sound as comforting as possible.  
  
"You know they, like, shouldn't bother. It's my problem I should, like, get my own back on him alone," said Ashley.  
  
"I'm sure," said TJ.  
  
The bell rang for class and TJ jumped up.  
  
"Better get to class huh?" asked Ashley slowly getting off the table.  
  
"Yeah I'd better go meet with the others," said TJ. Ashley sighed and watched as TJ practically ran into the school.  
  
She walked into the school and felt three pairs of eyes on her back.  
  
Ashley sped up her pace so that she didn't get caught in the awkward position with her ex best friends.  
  
She rushed into the classroom and took her seat.  
  
She noticed TJ and his gang stood next to T.J's desk in a tight group.  
  
Her fellow Ashley's walked past her with loathing looks on their faces just as Miss Grotke came in.  
  
The other three Ashleys cast evil glances at her as they walked to their seats.  
  
T.J's group parted and went to their seats while miss Grotke sorted out what subject to do.  
  
Ashley couldn't help taking glances behind her at TJ who was whispering to Vince. 


	5. the pity

End of the day....  
  
The bell rang for the end of the day and everyone got out his or her seats in a hurry.  
  
Ashley watched as her ex best friends left all giving her sneering looks.  
  
She picked up her bag and walked out to her locker.  
  
She opened it and put her books in and closed it.  
  
"Hey Ashley." said a voice.  
  
Ashley turned around as she was going to walk out of the school.  
  
"Yeah?" asked Ashley.  
  
She saw TJ and the others walking towards her.  
  
"We were wondering if you wanted to come and get a soda?" asked Gretchen taking a nervous glance at Vince, Mikey and Gus.  
  
"Um sure." smiled Ashley nervously putting a piece of hair behind her ear.  
  
"Well let's go then," said Spinelli striding in front with Vince, Mikey and Gus.  
  
Gretchen was going to walk with TJ and Ashley when Vince caught her eye and shook his head.  
  
Gretchen left TJ and Ashley alone to walk in an awkward silence.  
  
"So don't you usually take a ride with your mum?" asked TJ breaking the silence.  
  
"Usually. But today I was supposed to go to Ashley T's house. I'm sure mum will understand," said Ashley looking down at her feet.  
  
The silence reared its ugly head again and TJ looked at the others who were walking in front of him and Ashley.  
  
He saw Vince walking backwards and looking at the two.  
  
TJ didn't know what else to say to Ashley so he shrugged his shoulders at Vince but Vince indicated for him to continue talking and gave him thumbs up.  
  
TJ looked at Ashley's profile.  
  
Her eyes cast down at the pavement made her seem vulnerable; TJ had never seen that about Ashley before.  
  
Her lips were pursed and her hair a slight mess, as if she hadn't been bother to brush it after her friends rejected her.  
  
TJ saw Ashley sense him looking at her and switched to looking at the sky to avoid catching her gaze.  
  
Spinelli looked behind her and heard no talking she didn't know why the others wanted Ashley to become part of their gang anyway.  
  
In her opinion Ashley was and always will be a snotty powder puff.  
  
But she was the only one who felt that way.  
  
Even TJ seemed to want to give her a chance.  
  
Spinelli sighed.  
  
It felt like she'd entered the twilight zone.  
  
Ashley looked back at the pavement still wanting to stop her from embarrassment.  
  
Soon they arrived at Kelso's store and everyone went to order their soda and Ashley felt like an outsider as the gang chatted around her.  
  
She could tell they were trying to make an effort, to include her as much as possible.  
  
But deep inside she knew it was for the guilt, because they felt sorry for her.  
  
She sipped her cream soda that Gretchen had got for her before getting up.  
  
She put on her bag and left the others to their talking.  
  
She walked home alone and walked in to see Tyler reading the rest of her diary at the breakfast bar in the kitchen.  
  
"Like, get away squirt and, like, do your homework!" yelled Ashley snatching it off her brother.  
  
Brittany was in her room finger painting on the walls so Ashley just went to her room and began her homework not expecting any usual phone calls from her ex best friends. 


	6. The next day

The next day...  
  
Ashley was dropped off at school with Tyler and Brittany just as TJ and the others walked up the street.  
  
Tyler began to sing 'TJ and Ashley sitting in a tree K.I.S.S.I.N.G'  
  
Ashley narrowed her eyes at Tyler and pushed him up the steps.  
  
"Hey Ashley." smiled Gretchen.  
  
"Like, hi guys." said Ashley  
  
"Where'd you get to last night?" asked TJ as the gang walked into the school.  
  
"I, like, had to get home." smiled Ashley weakly.  
  
"Anyway we were wondering if you wanted to play some kick ball after school?" asked Vince.  
  
"I don't know I'll like think about it and let you know," said Ashley before she quickened her pace to get to the classroom.  
  
TJ frowned while the others made their way down the corridor to their room.  
  
He sensed Ashley wasn't being honest but then again after what happened yesterday in recess she'd been acting a bit strange.  
  
He walked in and saw Ashley sat alone with her diary on her desk.  
  
She was ripping out every single page, ripping the page into pieces and the pieces were falling all over the floor.  
  
TJ sighed as he walked past her to his own desk.  
  
He had to talk to her at recess and ask her what was wrong.  
  
At recess...  
  
Ashley rushed out the room, clutching her diary, and ran toward the nearest girl's toilets.  
  
TJ cringed.  
  
He'd wanted to talk to Ashley but going in the girl's bathroom was against the playground rules.  
  
Gretchen was already stood outside debating to her self whether she should go in or not. "Gretch, will you please go in and ask Ashley to come out?" asked TJ.  
  
"I don't know Teej. I mean I can try if you want but..." begun Gretchen until TJ just sighed in a way that made her give in.  
  
"Fine I'll see what I can do." sighed Gretchen.  
  
TJ smiled and Gretchen walked in.  
  
One stall was closed, on the door was written 'Ashley A loves TJ Deitweiler 4va'.  
  
Gretchen knocked on the door and heard sobbing from the other side.  
  
"Ashley? Want to talk?" asked Gretchen.  
  
"Like no thanks Gretchen. I'd, like rather be alone," sobbed Ashley.  
  
"But Ashley, TJ wants to talk to you." Said Gretchen.  
  
"Well tell him I don't want to see him. I just want to be alone," said Ashley, the tears slowly subsiding.  
  
Gretchen sighed and walked out the toilets.  
  
TJ was stood waiting for Ashley to come out and when Gretchen came out and shook her head TJ felt he had to take matters into his own hands.  
  
"Gretch will you take watch outside?" asked TJ.  
  
"Teej what are you going to do? You can't go in there," said Gretchen.  
  
"I need to talk to Ashley and if she won't come out then I'm going in.," said TJ.  
  
"Fine I'll keep watch but don' be too long." said Gretchen.  
  
TJ walked into the girl's bathroom and Gretchen stood in front of the door to keep people out.  
  
"Ashley we need to talk." said TJ.  
  
"TJ what are you doing in here?" asked Ashley through her tears.  
  
"We need to talk. Please come out of there," said TJ standing outside the cubicle.  
  
Ashley sighed and wiped her tears as she got off the toilet.  
  
She opened the door and saw TJ stood leaning against a wall near the hand dryers.  
  
"Want to tell me what's wrong Ashley?" asked TJ.  
  
Ashley closed the door behind her and walked slowly towards TJ.  
  
"I've just felt like such a loner since the others rejected me. Like last night I knew you were trying to involve me out of pity. I like don't want to be pitied," said Ashley nervously putting a piece of hair behind her ear.  
  
"We know you don't want to be pitied Ashley, but it's kinda hard not to." said TJ with an apologetic look.  
  
"I suppose." smiled Ashley.  
  
"So what were you doing with your diary this morning?" asked TJ  
  
"I've decided that diaries are like nothing but trouble. Which is why as of now, I'm officially a no diary girl," said Ashley gesturing to he diary she'd thrown in the bin.  
  
"But you don't need to give up on writing a diary just be cause of your brother." said TJ.  
  
"But I'll only be embarrassed again and I don't want that to happen, especially if it embarrasses you too," said Ashley turning away from facing him.  
  
TJ sighed, as his heart pounded in his chest.  
  
"Now I think you'd better leave Teej before you get caught in the girls bathroom. Lord know what King Bob will do to you for coming in here." said Ashley looking in the mirror.  
  
TJ put a hand on her shoulder before he walked out the main door, where Gretchen was still stood keeping guard  
  
"What did she say?" asked Gretchen.  
  
"I think you should talk to her. I sure as hell just messed things up," sighed TJ leaning against the wall next to the door.  
  
Gretchen frowned as TJ sunk to the floor.  
  
Gretchen walked into the toilets and saw Ashley staring aimlessly into the mirror.  
  
"Are you OK?" asked Gretchen.  
  
"I'm fine. I just think that TJ and me shouldn't be so close. Enough rumours are going around. Maybe I should just be a pale kid," said Ashley.  
  
"Ash you shouldn't let what happened yesterday effect you so much," said Gretchen in a reassuring tone.  
  
"Me and TJ will never be close, with everyone watching." sighed Ashley.  
  
"Come on Ashley. TJ may like you too, you just need to find a way to ignore all the whispering." said Gretchen.  
  
The bell went for class and Ashley smiled at Gretchen as the two walked out the bathroom.  
  
TJ was already in the classroom, sat next to Vince and Ashley took a deep breath as she moved from her usual spot to sit next to Gretchen and behind TJ.  
  
Gretchen smiled at her and Ashley couldn't help but smile too. 


	7. At lunch

At lunch...  
  
Ashley followed the gang to the cafeteria and got her lunch with them.  
  
She stood at their table debating where to sit.  
  
Gretchen nodded her head in the direction of the empty seat next to TJ.  
  
Ashley smiled and took the empty seat.  
  
She felt the whole cafeteria stare at her as she began to eat.  
  
TJ was surprised when Ashley sat down beside him and began to eat, ignoring all the staring.  
  
He looked at Gretchen and saw she was smiling.  
  
TJ sighed and continued to eat.  
  
He felt Ashley's hand make her way into his under the table and squeeze his hand tightly.  
  
He looked at Ashley who looked at him shyly.  
  
TJ felt the whole cafeteria staring at them but smiled at Ashley to let her know it was OK.  
  
When everyone in the gang had finished eating they went out to the playground, TJ and Ashley with their hands still clasped together.  
  
The occupants of the playground were whispering, but it didn't bother Ashley anymore.  
  
Ashley smiled up at TJ and saw Gretchen giving her the thumbs up out of the corner of her eye.  
  
The gang around her were looking between her and TJ, kind of shocked.  
  
"Its OK guys don't look so shocked," said TJ as the gang sat down on the grass.  
  
"But TJ I thought you didn't want the whole playground to know." said Vince.  
  
"Know what TJ?" asked Ashley curiously.  
  
TJ wondered whether it was right to tell Ashley yet when the bell rang for class.  
  
"Come on guys let's get to class." said TJ as he got up and pulled Ashley to her feet.  
  
They all walked in to the class and Ashley sat down in the desk next to TJ.  
  
After school...  
  
Ashley waited for TJ outside the classroom while he talked with the gang.  
  
"You think i should tell her guys?" asked TJ leaning against his desk.  
  
"I don't know Teej," said Gus.  
  
"I mean she should know but you'll risk as much humiliation as she did," said Vince.  
  
"If you want to tell her tell her Teej. The humiliation shouldn't hold you back if you like her that much." said Gretchen.  
  
"I suppose. Anyway let's go." said TJ deciding to put it off as much as possible.  
  
TJ walked out and took Ashley's hand as they walked out the school.  
  
"So are we going to play kick ball?" asked Vince bouncing a ball in front of him as he walked.  
  
"Um i like just remembered my mother wants me home early today. I've like got to go but I'll see you guys tomorrow," said Ashley spotting her mother's car parked up.  
  
"Bye Ashley." said the others.  
  
TJ gave her hand a squeeze before Ashley let go and walked towards the car where Tyler and Brittany were getting in.  
  
She got in and watched as the gang walked towards the kick ball field.  
  
TJ saw Ashley's car drive passed and shoved his hands into his pockets and keep the feeling of Ashley's skin on his palm.  
  
"Come on TJ i told Lawson and the others we'd be there." said Vince.  
  
"I don't feel like playing kickball Vince. Maybe I'll catch you and the gang later," said TJ.  
  
"But Teej...."objected Vince stunned.  
  
"I'll see you tomorrow," said TJ before he began to walk home.  
  
Gretchen looked regretfully at Vince before she caught up with TJ.  
  
Mikey and Gus looked at Vince.  
  
"Just go. I'll reschedule with Lawson." Sighed Vince walking towards the filed.  
  
Spinelli gritted her teeth as she began to walk home.  
  
"You OK Teej?" asked Gretchen interrupting his train of thought.  
  
"What? Oh hey Gretch thought you were staying with Vince and the others," asked TJ.  
  
"Na but I'm betting Vince won't be happy," said Gretchen.  
  
"Yeah well." shrugged TJ.  
  
"Something wrong TJ?" asked Gretchen.  
  
"Not really. It's just I'm thinking how I'm going to tell Ashley my feelings for her?" asked TJ.  
  
"I'm sure you'll find a way yo tell her Teej. She means so much to you," said Gretchen.  
  
"I suppose. But the laughs and whispers of people are holding me back." said TJ stopping outside Kelso's store.  
  
"Want to stop for a root beer float Teej?" asked Gretchen.  
  
"Thanks Gretch." said TJ as she led the way into the store. 


	8. thing is

"The thing is TJ you and Ashley both have the same fears," said Gretchen as she and TJ sat at the bar.  
  
"We do?" asked TJ questionably as Mr. Kelso put two floats in front of them.  
  
"Of course. Ash is just as worried about telling you how she feels. She has more feelings for you inside than what Tyler A read out to the playground. You need to trust your instincts and just tell her," said Gretchen sipping her float.  
  
"I want to I just don't know how to." sighed TJ.  
  
"Here take this," said Gretchen taking a piece of paper out of her and passing it to him.  
  
"What is it?" asked TJ.  
  
"Just take it. If you finally pick up the courage use this number and tell her," said Gretchen.  
  
"But Gretchen..."began TJ.  
  
"I've got to get home Teej. I've got a project to start. If you need any time to chat then call me," said Gretchen picking up her bag before leaving TJ alone.  
  
TJ sighed as he drank his root beer float before he walked home.  
  
Ashley lay back on her bed looking at the ceiling wen the phone rang.  
  
Ashley sighed and answered it automatically.  
  
"Like, hello?" asked Ashley.  
  
"Um Ashley it's TJ. I was wondering if you could meet up with me tonight?" asked TJ flicking through his maths book to steady his nerves.  
  
"I'd, like, like to TJ but I've, like, got to finish my maths," said Ashley as her heart pounded in her chest.  
  
"Come on Ash. I won't hold you up long. I just wanted to see you," said TJ closing his book.  
  
"I'll, like, try TJ. But I'm like not making any promises." said Ashley.  
  
"Meet me at the school playground at nine. I'll be waiting," said TJ.  
  
"Like I said. I'll, like, try," said Ashley.  
  
"Bye Ash." said TJ before he hung up.  
  
Ashley put the phone back and hurried her homework before she got changed. She told her mother where she was going before she went back to school to meet TJ.  
  
TJ walked back to the playground trying to figure out what he'd say to Ashley when he saw her.  
  
It was going to be easier since there was no one else there but still he was nervous.  
  
When he arrived he saw Ashley sat on top of the climbing frame.  
  
Ashley spotted him and jumped down to talk to him.  
  
"Hey TJ, like, what's up?" asked Ashley.  
  
TJ took her hand and Ashley could tell he was trying to find the right words.  
  
"Maybe I should speak first TJ. I love you more than Tyler can know. I have been wanting to tell you for so long." said Ashley as they sat down on a table.  
  
"I really love you Ash with all my heart. I have for as long as I can remember. When I kissed spinelli I always wished it had been you." said TJ.  
  
Ashley moved her lips towards his and soon the two were kissing the way TJ had always imagined but some thing was wrong. 


	9. Spinelli's secret

TJ heard a gasp and the sound of someone crying.  
  
He pulled away and saw spinelli running away.  
  
TJ couldn't believe that Spinelli was hurt. He'd always thought she was tough. But seeing her crying meant she'd held feelings for him deep inside.  
  
TJ cursed inside while smiling apologetically at Ashley.  
  
"Want me to walk you home Ash?" asked TJ.  
  
"Please Teej. " smiled Ashley.  
  
TJ took her hand after they'd jumped down and walked her off the playground to her house.  
  
But he knew he had to talk to spinelli.  
  
TJ walked to Spinelli's after he had walked Ashley home.  
  
He knocked on the door knowing Spinelli was alone that night since her parents always went out shopping on a Wednesday night.  
  
He watched the lights in the entire house be turned off and had a feeling spinelli didn't want to talk to him.  
  
He banged on the door and called out to her but the door didn't open.  
  
Spinelli couldn't believe what she'd heard TJ say.  
  
"He wished he'd been kissing Ashley A," hissed Spinelli as she wiped the tears of hurt out her eyes.  
  
She'd liked TJ since second grade but had never told him afraid of her reputation going bust.  
  
She saw someone coming up to the front door and turned off all lights hoping he'd take the hint and go away.  
  
But he continued to bang at the door and call her name, which made her heart, ache but she couldn't stand it. Seeing him kiss that powderpuff had hurt her and the image had been burned into her eyes.  
  
She curled up on the sofa alone in the dark wising to be alone and stay that way.  
  
"Come on spin. I can explain what you saw," said TJ.  
  
Spinelli felt the tears stream down her cheeks and rested her chin on the tops of her knees.  
  
She wanted to call out but her voice had submerged to the tears.  
  
"I'll see you at school then Spin. i hope." said TJ.  
  
Spinelli watched a dark figure go back down the path and stayed sat in the dark. 


	10. the day after

The next day...  
  
"So spinelli saw you and ash and flipped?" asked Gretchen.  
  
"Exactly. I tried to talk to her but she wouldn't answer. She turned off all the lights and wouldn't let me in," sighed TJ.  
  
"I remember Spin did tell me about her crush o you once. i thought she was joking but after this it does make me wonder." said Gretchen.  
  
"Damn." cursed TJ.  
  
The two arrived at school and saw Vince, Gus and Mikey waiting for them.  
  
"Have you seen spin?" asked TJ.  
  
"Nope. We stopped by her house but no one came out," said Vince.  
  
TJ sighed when Ashley came towards him and took his hand.  
  
"Like, hey guys." said Ashley.  
  
"Hey Ash. You haven't seen spinelli have you?" asked Gretchen.  
  
"No why?" asked Ashley hold back a nasty comment about TJ's friend.  
  
"We're just curious as to why she's not at school," said Gretchen before TJ spilled what had happened the night before.  
  
"Well like I don't know." Said Ashley.  
  
"I'll go and see if I can persuade her to come. There's enough time," said Gretchen.  
  
"We'll be at class," said Vince.  
  
TJ wanted to go with her but Ashley would be suspicious.  
  
Gretchen walked back down the street towards Spinelli's house.  
  
Spinelli's parents had left early so they hadn't been able to drag spinelli to school.  
  
Spinelli was sat in bed staring at the ceiling recalling what had happened last night, what she'd seen.  
  
When there was a knock at the front door.  
  
Spinelli got up and walked to he window to see Gretchen at the front door.  
  
Spinelli put on a long jacket and went down longing to talk to her only female friend. She opened the door and pulled Gretchen in.  
  
"Spinelli TJ and the others are wondering where you are." said Gretchen.  
  
"Let them. TJ doesn't need my friendship," said spinelli sitting down.  
  
"TJ told me you saw him and Ashley kissing last night and that you were upset," said Gretchen.  
  
"You don't get it Gretch, it wasn't only the kissing it was what Teej said before." said Spinelli looking down.  
  
"What did he say?" asked Gretchen.  
  
"He said while he'd been kissing me in that experiment he had been wishing it was Ashley A instead of me," said Spinelli.  
  
"Ouch that's got to hurt," said Gretchen.  
  
"You have no idea. Anyway I think you'd better go to school. Maybe I'll see you after school?" asked Spinelli.  
  
"Sure. Bye spin." said Gretchen before she walked out.  
  
Spinelli sighed before she went into the kitchen and piled cereal into a bowl.  
  
Gretchen arrived back at school before the bell rang and met up with the gang in class.  
  
"Where's Spin?" asked Vince.  
  
"I'm guessing she's not coming." sad TJ.  
  
"Damn right she's not. Especially after what you said TJ. If I were you I wouldn't even consider her your friend anymore." said Gretchen sitting in a corner of the classroom alone.  
  
TJ frowned, confused when Miss Grotke came into the room. 


	11. At recess and so on

At recess...

The bell rang and everyone got up except Gretchen who seemed determined to avoid TJ after her visit to Spinelli's

TJ wanted to talk to her so he shooed everyone to recess, even Ashley.

"Hey Gretch. Can we talk?" asked TJ.

"I suppose." said Gretchen burying herself in her work.

"What did Spin say I said that hurt her?" asked TJ sitting down in the desk next to her.

"Do the words 'when I kissed Spinelli I always wished it had been you Ashley A.' mean anything to you?" asked Gretchen not looking up.

TJ groaned.

"See that's what hurt Spinelli aside from the kiss she saw Teej." said Gretchen putting down her pencil and looking at her friend.

"I didn't know she'd heard that Gretch. Honest, but it does make sense now," said TJ.

"I suggest you talk to her after school. I'm going over there too maybe I can persuade her to talk to you," said Gretchen.

"I doubt it but it's worth a try Gretch."" sighed TJ.

After school...

Gretchen met up with TJ and the others outside school and they began to walk along talking.

Soon they reached Spinelli's house and Gretchen went up the path to the door.

She turned around when she realised TJ wasn't then and beckoned him to the door.

TJ kissed Ashley good-bye and said goodbye to the others before joining Gretchen on the porch.

Gretchen knocked on the door and Spinelli soon answered dressed in a pair of sweat pants and a large sweatshirt.

"Hey Spin, I brought your homework," said Gretchen passing her friend a bunch of sheets.

Spinelli put them on the coffee table and let Gretchen in.

She then noticed TJ come in and couldn't believe Gretchen had asked TJ to come.

"What's he doing here Gretch!" hissed Spinelli.

"He wants to talk to you Spin," said Gretchen.

"He's wasting his breath," hissed Spinelli.

TJ hesitated but Gretchen narrowed her eyes at him.

"I want to say I'm sorry Spin," said TJ.

"You don't even know what your sorry for TJ. I can see it by the fake look on your face. Just get out," said Spinelli looking at his face.

"But Spin I..." began TJ.

"I said GET OUT!" yelled Spinelli her voice breaking.

TJ sighed and walked out the door leaving Gretchen to comfort her.

"You should have let him explain Spin," said Gretchen sitting down beside her.

"Why? So he can feel better about himself and still go out with that Powder puff? I don't think so Gretch. Anyway I think my parents will be back soon. I'll see you later," said Spinelli.

"Sure Spinelli. I'll see you then." smiled Gretchen gong out the door.

Spinelli sat down and turned on the wrestling to help her relax. But even the sport of two people beating each other to near death couldn't help her forget the image of her friend and a power puff.

TJ waited till Gretchen came out to see what she'd said but he could tell by the look on her face he had a lot to make up for in Spinelli's books.

"She's not too happy Teej. I doubt she'll want to hang out with you anymore either." said Gretchen closing the door.

"I never expected Spinelli to be so hurt over something I said about her." said TJ as they walked to Kelso's.

"TJ she always has cared about what you thought about her. But now..I don't know if she can get over this," sighed Gretchen.

"I want to apologise. I just don't know what to say and sound sincere. That's never been my strong point," said TJ.

"I can't help you Teej. To be sincere your apology has to come from inside you," said Gretchen.

The two carried on past Kelso's and soon arrived at TJ's house.

"I'll see you then Gretch," said TJ.

"Bye Teej." said Gretchen walking to her own house.

TJ went inside and prepared for a night of phone calls that wouldn't be taken.

He sat on his bed with the phone beside him and dialled Spinelli's number.

"Hello?" asked a voice.

"Hello. Is this Spinelli?" asked TJ.

"Yes." Said the voice.

She then realised it was TJ and hung up.

TJ continued to try and call her all night.

Gretchen sat on her bed working on a project when her phone rung.

"Hello?" asked Gretchen.

"Like Gretch, I was wondering if I had anything to do with Spinelli's behaviour?" asked Ashley.

"No you didn't. It's just Spinelli wasn't feeling so well today," said Gretchen cringing as she lied.

"Oh, it's just I was like wonder if that was the case so I could like apologise." said Ashley.

"Like I said Ash it's just she's feeling under the weather." Said Gretchen as she built the machine together.

"That is like such a relief." smiled Ashley.


	12. The talking and the pain

The next day...

TJ got up early hoping to talk to Spinelli before school when he spotted her kicking a ball against the dodge ball wall.

He tied up his bike and went to watch her.

Her movements showed a violent girl who often beat people up.

But when he looked at her he saw the side of her she'd been trying to hide for so long.

He then sat down when she began to bang her fists against the walls angrily.

"Spinelli." said TJ.

He saw her pause and turn around.

"What do you want TJ?" asked Spinelli rubbing her numb hands.

"I want to talk with you Spinelli. Come sit down." said TJ.

"I'd rather stand," said Spinelli folding her arms.

TJ got up and pulled her to sit down in a swing beside him.

"Listen Spin Gretchen told me what you told her and I'm so sorry," said TJ swinging slightly.

"You aren't sorry Teej," said Spinelli swinging high.

"I am truly Spinelli I just wish you'd believe me," said TJ looking at her.

"Well I don't TJ. You and that powder puff deserve each other as far as I'm concerned. Because you both don't take other people's feelings in to consideration." spat Spinelli jumping off the swing at it's highest.

"That's not true Spin and you know it's not!" exclaimed TJ.

"It is TJ! Now just leave me alone," yelled Spinelli picking up her bag from behind the dodge ball wall and walking into the school.

TJ sighed and picked his bag up before meeting up with the others at the front of the school.

He soon saw Gretchen and Ashley walking.

He caught Gretchen's eye and shook his head.

Gretchen sighed.

"I'll like go and try to talk to her if you want," said Ashley.

"I'm not so sure that's a good idea Ash," said TJ.

"Let her TJ. She might be able to reason with her," said Gretchen.

"She's in school somewhere," said TJ.

Ashley walked into the school leaving TJ and Gretchen to wait for the others.

She went into the toilets and saw Spinelli punching a wall vigorously.

"Um like Spinelli can we like talk?" asked Ashley.

"What do you want powder puff?" asked Spinelli.

"Like TJ is very upset that you're not his friend anymore. Yet he won't tell me why. If it has anything to do with me I'm like sorry. But like maybe I can help." said Ashley leaning against the all.

"I doubt you can powder puff. Since you and TJ have admitted you feelings TJ has changed. It is in part your fault and nothing can be done to make up for it. Now just leave me alone," said Spinelli punching the wall again.

Ashley turned and left Spinelli alone.

She walked out just in time to catch up with the gang.

"It, like, didn't go well TJ. I'm like sorry," said Ashley.

"It's OK Ash. Come on let's get to class." said TJ taking her hand.

Gretchen went into the toilets and saw Spinelli sunk against the wall, crying, and her hands red and bloody.

It was a sight she'd never thought she'd see.

She sat down beside Spinelli and hugged her sobbing friend to her.

"Come on Spin we need to get to class." said Gretchen helping Spinelli to her feet.

TJ was talking to Ashley when he saw Gretchen walk in with Spinelli who was crying and her hands were red and bloody.

Miss Grotke spotted Gretchen and Spinelli and gesture for Spinelli to go to the nurse.

Gretchen looked at TJ who was shocked before leading Spinelli to the nurse.


	13. Persuation and heartache

Recess...

Spinelli laid on the bed in the nurse's office her hands bandaged and her face covered in salty tears of anger, sadness and trauma.

Gretchen came in soon with Mikey and Vince.

"You Ok Spin?" asked Vince looking at her.

Spinelli didn't even look the two but just stared into space.

Gretchen looked at her friends and could tell they were worried.

"It's because of TJ and Ash you guys. There isn't anything we can do," said Gretchen.

"Does Teej know?" asked Mikey.

"Yep. But he needs pushing to apologise." said Gretchen.

The two boys looked at each other.

"We'll be right back," said Vince before he and Mikey walked out.

"Come on Spin we'll sort this out all you need to do is forgive him." said Gretchen.

"I can't Gretch. I love him," murmured Spinelli.

"But Spin he loves Ash." said Gretchen.

Spinelli began to cry hoarsely and Gretchen looked to see TJ stood in the doorway.

"Spin. " said TJ coming towards Spinelli and crouching down beside her.

"Maybe I should leave," said Gretchen looking at TJ.

"Stay Gretch. He shouldn't even be here," said Spinelli turning over and clenching her aching hands into fists, which caused pain up her arms.

TJ didn't know what to do.

Spinelli wouldn't accept his apologies and still Mikey and Vince had pushed him in.

"Spin. Believe me I don't want to hurt you. But me and Ash are...." TJ began though he couldn't finish his sentence.

"I don't believe you Teej," said Spinelli.

"Maybe you should leave Gretch. This won't take long," said TJ looking at Gretchen.

"No stay." said Spinelli putting a hand on Gretchen's arm.

"I'll only be gone a sec Spin." assured Gretchen before she left the room.

Spinelli wiped her red eyes with her bandaged hands and looked at TJ with narrowed eyes.

"Spin look I know I hurt you and I never intended to but me and Ash. We really like each other. And if I could change it I would." said TJ.

"I doubt you would TJ. Why would you want me when you can have miss powder puff head of the year?" asked Spinelli.

TJ looked at her and bit his lip.

"Because I love you. And to be honest I have since kindergarten Spinelli. But I love Ash now." said TJ.

"How can I believe you Teej? It seems like ever since the powder puff came to our group you've changed." spat Spinelli.

"I haven't Spin. I've got to go. I'll hopefully see you after," said TJ.

"Don't count on it." TJ heard Spinelli hiss.

He left the room and soon Gretchen came back in.

"How'd it go?" asked Gretchen.

"He's only trying to get into my good books and it's not working. I need to call my mum I can't stay here for the rest of the day with TJ here," said Spinelli.

"I've done it. She'll be here soon." assured Gretchen.

"Thanks Gretch." smiled Spinelli sitting up and rubbing her face dry of all the tears on her face.

"How much longer can you be mad at him Spinelli?" asked Gretchen watching Spinelli relax her hands so her knuckles wouldn't hurt.

"I can make this last till high school. TJ doesn't need me so I don't have to take his apology." shrugged Spinelli wincing as she put her hands into fists and the bandages began to get covered in blood.

"Oh pookie, are you OK? When Gretchen called me I thought you'd fallen of the jungle gym and were taken to hospital," said Mrs Spinelli.

"Let's just go mum," sighed Spinelli as she got up from the bed.

"Fine Pookie. It was nice to see you again Gretchen." smiled Mrs Spinelli before she and Spinelli left the room.

Gretchen went back to class.


	14. The truth

Lunch...

Gretchen sat in the library after eating her lunch in the cafeteria.

TJ and Ashley had been very lovey dovey and Gretchen could tell what spinelli meant when she said that TJ had changed.

He was practically trying to chew her neck like chewing gum.

Gretchen sighed and spotted the Library kid sat in her usual spot, the reading corner.

Gretchen often came into observe her and make sure she was keeping under control.

TJ soon came in and Gretchen got to her feet.

"Gretch wait." called TJ.

"What Teej?" asked Gretchen.

"Do you think Spinelli was right about me?" asked TJ

"To be completely honest TJ the only person who doesn't see it is you." said Gretchen.

"But how have I changed? I don't get it," said TJ.

"Think about it Teej. You ignore your friends, won't play kickball anymore and we haven't done a plan since she got involved. I'm sorry Teej but what Spinelli said is the complete and utter truth," said Gretchen.

TJ left the library and Gretchen watched him, knowing it was for the best.

TJ couldn't believe what Gretchen had said. But if he thought about it, it made some sense.

He'd blown off each of his friends and caused Spinelli to get hurt both physically and mentally.

She undoubtedly hated him now.

TJ walked to the guys' toilets where it has all began in a way.

He didn't know what to do.

He loved Ashley and had had deep feeling for her for a long time.

But with Spinelli, she was his best friend...the person he'd shared experiences with like the kissing experiment and stuff like that.

He had lots of memories with Spinelli and whenever he thought of Spinelli his heart rate increased.

His head fell into his hands and a groan came from his throat.

What to do? What to do?

"TJ you in here?" asked a voice.

"Yep." sighed TJ coming out the cubicle he was in.

"Gretch told us what you said to Spin. If you love Spin so much, then how can you love Ash too?" asked Vince.

"I don't know Vince. I'm too confused." groaned TJ sinking to the floor next to the hand dryer.

"Let me put it this way man. Do you really like Ash or do you pretend to feel that way so she wasn't embarrassed?" asked Vince.

TJ thought about it till his head hurt from banging his head against the wall.

"Well?" asked Vince.

"I suppose I'm unclear about this. But I've known Spinelli so much longer. I need to tell Ashe the truth," said TJ.

"Wonder how she'll take it." said vine.

"I hate to think of it," sighed TJ as he got up.

"Well good luck Teej." said Vince.

Teej smiled a weak smile before he left the toilets.


	15. realisation

He found Ashley sat reading a book at the tables on the black top.

"Um Ash...We need to talk..." said TJ sitting down opposite her.

"Like, sure TJ. What's wrong?" asked Ashley closing the book.

"Um...I'm sorry to say this but, I have a feeling that the feelings I felt for you aren't what I thought they were," said TJ.

"So what, Like, were they then?" asked Ashley.

"They were more like the feelings a guy has for his first crush." explained TJ.

"But like...that means you were lying. Like, why not tell me sooner?" asked Ashley.

"I only just realised. I'm so sorry Ashley," said TJ taking something out his backpack.

He took out a notebook and put it on the table.

"Like, what's that for?" asked Ashley looking at it.

"It's a new diary for you. Remember what I said Ash. You don't need to give up on writing a diary just be cause of your brother." said TJ getting up and leaving the notebook on the table.

Ashley looked at the notebook and opened it to see TJ had signed it.

It read

' Never forget Ash, that your brother doesn't rule your life, you do. Your friend always, TJ.'

Ashley smiled at it and looked longingly at TJ's retreating back.


	16. After school and present

After school....

TJ met up with Gretchen outside school and the two walked to Spinelli's house.

They arrived outside Spinelli's house and Spinelli answered the door.

"What do you want Teej?" asked Spinelli.

"I'll leave the two of you alone," said Gretchen walking to her own house.

"Can I come in Spin?" asked TJ.

"No you...." began Spinelli when her mum interrupted.

"Ashley let your friend in," said Mrs Spinelli.

"We're going up to my room mum," said Spinelli shutting the front door after TJ had come in.

The two went into Spinelli's room and Spinelli sat on her bed while TJ stood next to the bed.

"So TJ. Care to explain why you incessantly bug me when you have your powder puff?" asked spinelli crossing her arms.

"Spin...I kinda realised that Ashley meant nothing to me. I was feeling sympathy for her. But what I feel for you Spin...that's real." Said TJ sitting down on the bed beside her.

"How can I be sure?" asked Spinelli.

TJ took both her hands and unwrapped each bandage looking at the damage on her knuckles.

"You won't be able to give Randall a knuckle sandwich for a while," said TJ kissing each finger.

"I know but...." began Spinelli when TJ kissed her.

It was a longing that Spinelli had neve felt from TJ before. Not even when they'd kissed for the experiment before.

She'd forgotten how soft his lips were and how whenever he kissed her tongue would lightly touch her bottom lip.

"Will you let me Punch Randal for you? 'Cos I'd do that for you Spin." said TJ after he'd kissed her.

Spinelli smiled.

"Why not just kiss me again?" asked Spinelli.

"My pleasure." smiled TJ leaning in.

Ashley had found out about TJ and Spinelli getting together the next day from Gretchen and it had had hurt her deeply, but she'd known that it had been for the best.

Trying to keep together a relationship when he'd really loved Spinelli would have been useless.

Ashley heard her mother call her for dinner as she finished the last bit in her diary.

"I'm, like, coming." called Ashley putting down her pen.

She turned to the front cover where TJ's message was sat amongst the others from the rest of the gang and stroked it.

She wiped a tear from her cheek before she closed the diary and hid it under bed.

She then got up from the bed and left the room, while the memories and emotions still ran through her head.

FIN!


End file.
